Saturday, June 5, 2010

"don't stop thinking about tomorrow......yesterdays gone" (Fleetwood Mac)

for several years now, i have been trying hard to live in the moment. i have always been one to rehash my past mistakes, or try to over plan the future. i really like the eastern philosophy of living in the moment, being present and attuned to your environment. since i have been diagnosed with cancer, i have been really focused on enjoying each day and appreciating all the life around me.

my husband planted about 200 flowers and plants ( it seems) in my front yard so that i could have something beautiful to look at while i was recovering. it also helped him to do something positive, when he felt so helpless.i know it has been hard on him and i really do appreciate the beautiful flowers. when i look at my front yard,though, what i see blooming is a whole lot of love.

i start back to work on june 14th. i am a little nervous, of course. i work at  a very busy store, and i know it will take me a while to get back to speed. but i am also worried that i will forget what i now know to be so important. it is so easy to rush around trying to get to work, fix supper,do your chores,etc. and forget to look at and appreciate a beautiful flower or bird. or just take in a deep breath and look at how beautiful the sky is. having cancer is not all bad, really. it changes everything. how you view your faith, how you look at the world, what you know to be important. i realized a little bit of this last year when my mom died of cancer. but i will have to be honest, it really hits home when it is you.

2 comments:

  1. What a great post...especially that last paragraph, very poignant.

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  2. thanks sweetie!! that means a lot to me coming from an english teacher.

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