Thursday, May 18, 2017
May: a month to be thankful and celebrate, if you happen to be me. of course, it was not always the case...
as i have said, this is a "2Fer" blog. tomorrow, on may 19th, i will be a seven year thyroid cancer survivor. and on monday, may 22nd, i will be a two year breast cancer survivor. these are the two days that i had my surgeries ( people celebrate their cancerversaries using different guide lines. some use the diagnosis date, some the chemotherapy end date, etc.). i guess that i feel like the date to celebrate is the day that my surgeons removed the cancers from my body. of course, i had treatment with both cancers, but the majority of it was removed the day of my surgeries , or so my surgeons tell me.
besides celebration, yes there will be cake, every month of may i spend some time thinking about how far i have come down this cancer road. it has been a tricky road traveled at times- did i make the right decisions regarding treatment options, surgeons, hospitals, other physicians,etc. i tried my best to keep a level head amid the cancer chaos, but it was not easy. i did my research on the type of cancers that i had and the best way/ places to treat them successfully. but i will admit that sometimes, it was just a matter of faith. that, and a gut feeling that this or that decision was the correct one for me. i like to say that i live by" informed instinct" . i gather all of the information about something that i possibly can, then i listen to my inner voice before making an important decision- especially when it comes to my health.
i can honestly say that if i could go back in time, i would make the exact same decisions regarding my health. no do-overs, no get out of jail cards . i am thankful and grateful to all of my doctors, nurses and other health professionals who helped me along the way. i am blessed with amazing and loving family and friends. my spiritual self is much stronger. i recognize the power and value of prayer. i think that a feeling of being grateful is a huge part of finding peace and happiness after a cancer ( or two) diagnosis. i am not , nor was i ever, angry at what happened to me. but i will admit that at times i was discouraged and depressed. i still struggle with " cancer anxiety" especially around testing time. and man, do i have a lot of testing to deal with! that said, i realize that the testing is part of what i need to do to take good care of myself. i am doing all that i can to be here for my family.
my husband has almost finished building, all by himself, a stained glass tiny house studio for me. i will be doing stained glass projects, as well as soap and candle making in this studio. it is right outside the back door, and it is lovely. the walls are painted a soothing lavender, and the ceiling is hammered tin panels. it has four windows to let in plenty of light, a built in bench, a peg board for my tools, and even a hand crafted craft table . this was truly a labor of love on my husbands part. i am extremely grateful and thankful for this special place that is just for me. i might not be the most talented stained glass/candle/soap maker, but i will probably be the happiest one!
tomorrow, after i have some cake, of course, i will begin to move my craft supplies into my new studio. i see, hopefully, many years of enjoyment, creativity, and yes, gratitude in this special place . i also look forward to many more "mays" spent in this little building that was made primarily of love.