Thursday, November 8, 2012

"....go with the funk, it is said. that if you can't groove to this, you probably are dead. so wave your hands in the air, bust a few moves, fun your fingers through your hair. that is it for a winner, dance to this and you're going to get thinner. move, slide your rump, just for a minute, lets all do the bump, bump, bump. break it down! stop. hammer time!! you can't touch this! " can't touch this, by mc hammer

boy, just typing these lyrics is not nearly as fun as listening/ dancing to the song! it is not a zumba song, that i know of, but it would be a really good one! zumba has indeed made me thinner- or at least toned me up. i have noticed that is the case for many others in my class. it is so much fun, we hardly know that we are exercising. of course, i get so red in the face- no matter what i happen to do. i look like i have just completed the boston marathon or something. i used to be so embarrassed about this, but there is nothing that i can do about it- to prevent it from happening,etc. ( it is the red hair/freckles thing). there is a woman in my husband's spin class who does the same thing, so at least i have company.

next week i get to go to the imaging center for a double diagnostic mammogram. i am not sure why the radiologist is picking on me..... six months ago, i had a diagnostic mammogram on one side, and at that time he told the nurse to tell me that i would be having it done on both sides in six months. is it because i had cancer? is it because( some people believe this, some do not) i had a rather large dose of the I-131? and that may cause  me to  have a slightly  higher chance of having  breast cancer? i have questions to ask, and i believe that i am somewhat better informed this time. i wish that " the wizard" would come out from behind his curtain( he communicates with me via the nurse) and talk to me! perhaps i can smuggle toto in there to help me. he may in fact be the same " wizard" that administered my dose of I-131 two years ago.( well, he calculated the dose and had his space suit clad assistant bring it to me )  i decided not to go for the " deer in the headlights" look this time. i have questions, and by golly, if i have to pull back the curtain myself, i intend to get some answers!

you might be asking yourself why this song popped into my brain. i have decided that no matter what the doctors do to me- biopsies, surgery, I-131, ultrasounds, blood work, mammograms,etc, THEY CAN'T TOUCH ME. of course, they physically touch me, but " myself" inside belongs to me and me only. i am still the same person no matter what. i appreciate that the doctors are trying to take care of me, and i realize the importance of testing, but i am pretty sick of it.

so next week, while the wizard is hiding away in the next room, and the technician has me clamped down to the machine, i am going to be humming " can't touch this". if i get bad news i will deal with it. if i get good news, well..... i will go shopping of course. maybe i will go shopping anyway. then on to zumba class. maybe i will suggest this song to the instructor.

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