Sunday, October 3, 2010

" Here comes the sun...Little darling, it's been a long, cold, lonely winter. Little Darling, it feels like years since its been here- Here comes the sun, here comes the sun, and I say its alright. Little darling, the smiles returning to your face- seems like years since its been here." Here comes the Sun, by George Harrison

i had the best weekend that i have had since i got sick! not only did i get good news last week about my ultrasound and blood work, but i got to see both of my children( and their spouses, of course) this weekend. i feel just like that song- that it has been a " long, cold, lonely winter" and now the sun is back! and also, i feel like smiling again. oh, i put up a good face- the people i work with call me "brave and courageous". i am not, of course. i have dealt with this cancer the best that i could, and i have tried not to make the people around me suffer, or feel too miserable. anyone that knows me really well, though, could tell that i was not exactly myself. i am beginning to get stronger, but it has not been easy. sometimes i do not feel like taking a walk, or exercising, but i drag myself through it. and at the end, i do feel better. i try to get more rest- go to bed earlier, and i think that this is tremendously important,too. i feel that losing my mom to cancer last year, has had an impact on me as well. it made getting " the news" a little harder. but it also made me realize how much of an impact that i could have on my friends and family. i did not want them to suffer- but of course, it was hard on them,too. having the best attitude that i could about things helped them, and me,too, in the long run.

i made good on a promise this weekend,too. I DID ZUMBA WITH MY DAUGHTER!!  a whole hour class. neither one of us was sure that i could do it- we did stand in the back. i could just envision having to call 911 at some point. ( i wanted there to be plenty of room for the paramedics to get in). after about the third song, my daughter relaxed and stopped giving me these "worried looks". i was laughing my head off- when i could get my breath, of course. our instructor was so very nice- so positive and very sweet to everyone. but OMG what abs she had!! and my body does not( or will it ever, i think) move like hers did! i liked the class because there were all types of people in there( yes, some even more ancient than me). all fitness levels, all sizes, male and female. i can see why my daughter loves the classes so much. i am going to start attending a class about 30 minutes away from where i live. i decided that i could attend a live class once a week, and then on another two days per week( well, that's the plan, anyway) i could do my zumba DVD. i heartily recommend zumba to anyone. believe me, if i can do it, YOU can do it! get ready to laugh and enjoy yourself- of course there will be plenty of sweating- not perspiring, but the kind of sweating where your hair and underwear get wet! i happen to be one of those that think if you do not sweat a little, you really are not exercising.

yes, the smile is returning to my face. some of it is because i have been lucky so far, and i have been trying very, very hard to have a positive attitude. another part is how much love and support that i have gotten from my family and friends. as always, i am eternally thankful for you all.


  1. Bea,great you found an activity you will enjoy!

    I've been working on that aspect too, finding an activity I like and will stay with. I tend toward SADD during the winter months so hoping I can get something going now and stay with it during those gray, cold months too.

    My endo wants another ultrasound in November. Better than a body scan. The last ultrasound and biopsy came up clean in June. Good luck with your Zumba!

  2. It sounds like your having a great time with th.e zumba class. I'm happy that things are going well for you. I'm doing well too. We went to Monterey CA a week ago and I managed an 11 mile bike ride- cannery row and part of the 17 mile drive that goes to Carmel, by Pebble Beach. We had a great time! Don't you feel great (and tired) after the exercise? It really makes me feel exhilarated. AND you do really seem to have a great attitude. Don't let this get you down.

  3. Bea, I love this post it sound's like me. I always have a smile on my face or at least try to. I had my treatment today of the radioactive iodine and am sitting here with my gloves on. LOL. I want to thank you for all your support and prayers. I, like you, have alot of love and support. in the big picture of things, these gloves and all the inconveniences aren't going to matter. it's the time we get to spend with our loved ones. I will keep you posted but so far I am about as normal as ever. LOL Talk at ya later

  4. to Harlygirl: good for you!! you hang in there girlfriend, and please do let me know how you are doing. if you have any questions about how you are feeling after the I-131, please do not hesitate to contact me. good luck and prayers are with you!!