today was my six months check up for breast cancer. in may, i will officially be a three year breast cancer survivor, and an eight year thyroid cancer survivor. my surgery dates were only 3 days, and five years, apart. may, as a month, has not been so good to me. it is quite the coincidence, really.
so, as usual, as my husband and i got closer to the oncology center, i tried to divert him into the far right lane, instead of the left one. the right lane leads to the interstate, and eventually( 3 or 4 hours later ) to the beach. the left lane leads to the oncology center. it is a long standing joke between my husband and me. well, an almost three year one. the very first time that i went to the center for my first chemotherapy treatment, my husband almost fell for my attempts to run away to the beach. i will have to say that going there for my first treatment was one of the most terrifying experiences in my life- so far, anyway. the fear of the unknown, and the fact that i was aware that the first dose of chemotherapy is the strongest. it is the largest dose that they can give you,basically, that will save your life without killing you. your immune system is strongest before your first dose, of course. but no one is quite sure how anyone is going to react to the chemotherapy. my oncologist did reduce my dose slightly as we went along, and i knew what side effects that i would experience. that made the experience a little less terrifying.
oddly enough, and i am not the only person to experience this, i get nauseous when we pull into the parking lot. i had a lot of trouble with nausea and vomiting with my chemotherapy, and that all comes back to me, i suppose. another thing that bothers me, and this is sort of strange, is the smell of the hand sanitizer soap that the center uses. it is a violent reaction for me. i smell it when we come in the door, and of course i have to wash my hands a couple of times ( small bladder) before i get to leave the center. i am nauseous for the rest of the day, and even though i shower when we get back home, i can smell that darned soap for a day or two.
also today, i saw a woman that reminded me of myself during my treatment. she was very pleasant (put on a happy face for family and friends) and she told the receptionist that she preferred wearing head scarves instead of wigs. that was me, as well. i learned to tie head scarves from watching a you- tube video, and got rather good at it. i did have some pre-tied scarves, but i much preferred tying my own. i wanted to go up to her and give her a hug, and ask her how she was really doing. but since i did not want to scare the poor woman, i just smiled at her.
so the bottom line is that i had a good check up. i did not get all of my blood work results today, but i am not expecting any problems. they will mail me a copy of everything in a few days. i keep a record of all of my tests, procedures, etc, in a three ring note book. that is about the best piece of advice that i can give anyone facing serious health issues. be informed, and know what has happened, and is happening to you. i have amazing doctors, but i am not their only patient. occasionally, test results have been lost, but i have had my own copy and that has actually come in very handy on more than one occasion.
my husband told me today that i will now be " back to normal"( i should say my new normal ) for about the next five and one half months. then, the test anxiety, nausea, and moodiness will return. that said, i am getting a little stronger, a little tougher when test time rolls around. i guess i do get a little bit closer to feeling fine.
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