" looking back on when i was a little nappy headed girl, then my only worry was for Christmas, what would be my toy. even though we sometimes did not get very much, we were happy with the joy the day would bring....i wish those days could come back once more, why did those days ever have to go, i wish those days could come back once more, why did those days ever have to go, cause i love them so." i wish ( somewhat altered) lyrics by stevie wonder

i posted my blood work, ultrasound and appointment results on facebook, but i realized that not everyone who reads my blog is my facebook " friend". so for those of you who already know how it went, sorry to repeat this subject. i got a good check up basically. the most important thing, was that my thyroglobulin was less than 0.1 and  my anti- thyroglobulin antibodies were less than one. these two numbers were elevated for three years after my surgery and radioactive ( I-131) iodine treatment. those were a tough, worrisome three years. luckily, my endocrinologist did not panic, and we just kept my TSH very low, or suppressed, near zero, and waited it out. my doctor was considering another round of the I-131 just before my thyroid cancer indicators( above mentioned blood work) returned to the cancer free zone.

as far as my other blood work went, my TSH was good - 0.006- a little low, hahahaha. but that is the way that my endocrinologist wants it- i will explain why later in this blog. my doctor scared me a little during my office visit  when she first started talking to me. she said, " how are you feeling? are you having any heart palpitations, chest pain, shakiness, etc?" i said no, i was still feeling a little tired in the afternoons, but that was all. a few months  ago, my endocrinologist changed my medication. i went from the synthetic levoxyl and an occasional cytomel tablet in the afternoon, to a naturally derived medication. i know several people who do wonderfully on a naturally derived thyroid medication. in fact, a person in my family, who is hypothyroid, but who has not  had thyroid cancer, is taking this and has the best blood work numbers they have ever had. and best of all, this person feels better than they did when they were on the synthetic medication.  i really, really, really wanted this naturally derived medication to work for me, but it did not. i was extremely tired, depressed, cried a lot,etc - i knew that something was up. and i had to admit, it had to be the fact that  my thyroid medication was not working for me.

 so my doctor switched me back to the levoxyl/ cytomel combo.she called in a higher dose than i had been on previously. i thought that maybe she was trying to jump start my system so to speak.  i had been taking the higher dose of  levoxyl for about a month before my appointment. the reason why she was so concerned about how i was feeling was that my T4 had gone out of sight! the so called normal range, according to this lab- and labs have slightly different ranges- is 0.82-1.77. my value was 2.63 which puts me WAY into the hyperthyroid range. previously,  the highest my T4 has ever gotten to had been 2.1. my endocrinologist freaked out then, so you can image her concern this time.

my t3 was wonderful- 4.1 ( the range is 2.0-4.4). this is the " energy" part of a thyroid medication. i have previously not been able to hit 3.0 mark. but of course, this value  will go down again as i can not continue to have such a high T4. just a side note for those of you who may not be aware of this- synthetic thyroid medications ( levoxyl, synthroid, levothyroxine,etc) are just made up of T4. they  depend on the body to convert the T4 to T3 which mainly supplies the energy to the body. naturally derived hormone drugs ( nature-throid, armor thyroid, etc) contain naturally derived T4 AND T3. this is helpful if there is a problem on a cellular level- if your body, for whatever reason, has trouble converting T4 into the T3 that you need for your body to function properly. it seems to me that the naturally derived thyroid hormone would be the best choice, IF IT WORKS FOR YOU. but unfortunately, it did not work for me. as i have always said, this is not a one size fits all kind of thing. what is a wonderful choice for someone else, may be a terrible choice for you.

my endocrinologist lowered my dose of levoxyl( T4) , and added an afternoon cytomel( T3) if i need it. i really was not happy with this, but i understand that i can not have a T4 that is that high. having a T4 that is too high can cause heart arrhythmia's, chest pain, nervousness, osteoporosis, just to mention a few goodies. it is frustrating to me how complicated thyroid hormone dosing can be. most people, not thyroid patients for the most part, do not realize how difficult it is to get a thyroid dose, or dosage form, that is going to make the patient feel good and be able to function at a somewhat normal level. it is a trial and mostly error experience, at least for me. my endocrinologist has scheduled blood work for me again in three months to see how i am doing. which brings me to the topic of my next appointment...

i was really hoping that i could "graduate" to once a year tests, blood work and ultrasounds. my endocrinologist told me that because i had an area of " very aggressive thyroid cancer" i would need to stay on the every six months visits for a while longer. also, she wants to keep my TSH suppressed for the foreseeable future.  ( i said earlier that i would explain this). keeping the TSH at essentially zero is supposed to keep any thyroid cancer cells that are roaming around in the body from becoming active storm troopers. i was very O.K. with my doctor wanting to keep my TSH at zero. being a two time cancer survivor, i am nervous about there being a possible third time.

sometimes i think about my life before thyroid cancer or breast cancer. i try not to rehash the past, but i do sometimes long for it. i wish that i had never had cancer, to be honest. i have learned a lot from having cancer, though. i have discovered that i am stronger than i thought. i have found out how to be my own best patient advocate. i have really learned what things, and what people, are important in my life. i have learned that if i want to do something, i need to do it now, as the future is not guaranteed.  i have learned not to take anything for granted. and, probably the best thing that i have learned is to be grateful for everything good thing that comes my way.